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Saturday 14 September 2013

Spacecraft Discovery finds Parallel Thanet Universe

This week the spaceship Discovery was reported to have left the solar system.  I understand NASSA has confirmed that the spaceship has found  two previously unknown parallel universes which are remarkably similar to Margate and Ramsgate.  The first universe appears to be developing into in a modern, space age,  seaside resort with lots of inter-galactical investment. The second is run down, unloved and dilapidated. a bit like the surface of Mars.
Discovery has just transmitted some pictures back to earth which I have reproduced below.  Need I say more. Beam me up Scotty!

Universe Margate 
DREAMLAND PARK ATTRACTING SPACE TRAVELLERS FROM ACROSS THE UNIVERSE 








THE TURNER CENTRE TALK OF THE COSMOS AND BEYOND WHERE DARK MATTER IS THE NEW LIGHT MATTER 

Universe Ramsgate
 


 TANSEUROPA SPACE FERRY PORT DESTROYED  BY  INTER-PLANETARY INCOMPETENCE AND SECRET FEE DEFERRAL AGREEMENTS WITH UNTRUSTWORTH ALIEN BEINGS    





PLEASURAMA  RUINS THE RESULT OF STELLAR LAND GRABBING BY TIME TRAVELLING PROPERTY CRIMINALS WITH MYSTERIOUS GOLDEN BALLS



EMPTY AND BOARDED UP PLANET THANET  PAVILION FOR SALE AT KNOCK DOWN PRICE TO INTERESTED PAN-UNIVERSE ESATE AGENTS

 

12 comments:

  1. Good news from their Mars research though Ian, hidden life found - and they're all "Green", sounds like a party!

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    1. Green is the only logical choice Spock!

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    2. Well, I preferred Ramsgate as a child and I still do half a century or more later. All the Turners in the universe could not top Ramsgate Harbour with its bars and cafés.

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    3. Wow, you've been smoking some good sh*t today!

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    4. Not S H one T, perhaps I should report you to the police commissioner, Anon, like Louise has done with JH, for on line language. Seriously though, the Ramsgate waterfront taken from the harbour arm still makes a great picture and all those bars and cafés could not exist if people did not use them.
      What I never quite understand in this debate about TDC favouring Margate, being a Broadstairs type I guess, is why don't the RTC, many of whom are also on the TDC, do more to correct it.

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  2. It's great news. I heard they've found two things on the new planet: the names of the directors of SFP and the chances of getting money back from Transeuropa.

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  3. Research mission for a book of science fiction. A Ferengi businessman employs a workforce of local interbreds to make stuff that he flogs. Then one day an employee dobs another employee in. "He is nobbling the product"

    This is planet year 1981. And the Ferengi refers to his Rules of Acquisition. "Flog it off sharpish" is the rule of choice. So flogs his company to what is known there as a "Holding Company".

    Then he refers to his Rules of Acquisition again. "Start a rival company elsewhere in another area and don't employ any interbreds from the factory you just flogged".

    So he does that. But another Rule of Acquisition catches his cunning Ferengi eye. "Stay resident in the area of the interbreds and climb aboard the Planetary grant aid train"

    And so our Ferengi became a Director of a Grant Aid body that used the fashionable term "Initiative". Alongside him was Managing Director from the Interbreds but who happens to be leader of the Interbred District Council. And alongside him in the "Initiative" an interbred known as Chief Executive of the council.

    This sort of thing is Ferengi heaven. They create 100 jobs. At public expense.

    "What is our job", cried the self important 100.

    "To create jobs", chortled Ferengi. Classic pyramid selling scam. They had used public money to create jobs for 100 people to try to do the task for which they were getting paid more money whilst actually doing nothing.

    Ferengi genius.

    The 100 people paid to achieve economic regeneration were sent on courses to learn jargon. "Economic Drivers" being a fine example (That Hammy Interbred has signally failed to spot and use). And after much deliberation amidst much jargon they came up with "Access Road".

    Ferengi is back at his Rules of Acquisition. "Invest a bit in the company you flogged off and then direct grant aid at it to get it sold off to another larger company. Ferengi hedging investment return bets strategy"

    Works a treat. But. Some of the interbreds who had nobbled the Ferengi's product originally have set out to the planned end of the access road. And found work on what was called "A Development site"

    The Ferengi boss of the Development site asked "My development site is nobbled have these interbreds any history of nobbling ?"

    Our first Ferengi "Nope not to my knowledge excellent interbreds every one" (A rule of acquisition rather than get caught lie like hell)

    The second Ferengi stays operational long enough to get a return on investment then sacks 4000 interbreds.

    The interbreds take to "Blogging" and say all they need is an ice rink and a swimming pool and a harbour and not an airport and more Ferengi investment.

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  4. Ian, how about complaining to the police about a certain blogger's behavior towards you? It perhaps doesn't bother you too much, but he's really making a lot of local innocent people's lives a misery, yet when they complain the police refuse to investigate due to "lack of evidence". At least in your case there's PLENTY of evidence! So I urge you on behalf of many of yours friends and supporters to report him. Thank you.

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    1. Anon 10 43 I would guess you are not familiar with concepts like "Questions are more revealing than answers" or "Derision and insults are questions" ??

      I assume that you refer to our Hammy.

      He became prolific in the early hours a few nights ago. This in fact was after a comment to his blog on the subject of Sherlock Holmes dog that didn't bark.

      IE Spam bloggers introduced the identity of a cllr on blogs. And became quite strident in his defence (whilst never citing evidence or wrestling with facts). But the "Target" IE "Rick", of their blogging ire, drip fed them back two further names. And there was no strident defence forthcoming for the next two names Rick sprinkled on the spammers. Eloquent silences. So who was interviewing whom via the medium of the blog ?

      Hammy faced that reality that is most unacceptable to him, that he ain't as bright as those he targets.

      So I guess that Ian, like Rick, finds the spammers both amusing and unwittingly informative. Why reward their attention seeking behaviour with complaint.



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    2. Apparently Ann Barnes is taking Louise Oldfield's allegations very seriously, are you going to give them your help and support Ian?

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  5. You are a BLOODY JOKE Councillor Driver -what next to satisfy your all inclusive need to be recognised -you were a joke when employed by TDC as an idiot clerk in Democratic Services -which you obviously do not recognise -but your standing is at an all time low in the perception of the Public in Thanet -do us all and favour and disappear please -

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